I wish I went out more. But I
also don’t want to.
Social anxiety gets me every time I
try to be an extrovert.
Autism keeps me from succeeding in
relationships.
Some days, I feel sad and alone.
Someone once came up with the misconception that
autistics don't enjoy socializing or that people with Asperger's Syndrome are
all eccentric savants who sit around alone all day, trying to solve the
mysteries of the universe.
I'm not one of those people. I mean,
sometimes, I am one of those people. A lot of time. And
unmedicated, I am very antisocial.
But I am also a social creature, especially when I
take my medication properly.
I don't enjoy large groups, but I do love having
friends. I don't always want to be with people, but sometimes I crave
interaction. I don't always need to talk or text and sometimes my phone
drives me crazy, but other times it feels good to feel wanted.
I have social anxiety, like a lot of autistic
people. But I am still a social person. I still have a strong
desire to have friends and be in relationships. I still have a strong
desire to be needed by others. I think that's a human quality. I don't think it has to be with being autistic or being neurotypical; I think humans are social creatures and we all - deep down somewhere - crave friendship and interaction.
It just felt like something I should share. Because I hate stereotypes about autistic people. And if your friend has autism, you shouldn't ignore them. Ever. Because autistic people (I'm generalizing here - sorry - but it applies for me) might not always be the best at telling you how much we appreciate your friendship, but we do.
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