Tuesday, 11 June 2013

Feeling Anxious

For a lot of people, Asperger's Syndrome comes with a need for a consistent plan.  I definitely fit in that category of Autistics; I NEED a plan in order to function.
I need to know what I am doing today.  I need to know what must be done.  I need to know what I want to be done.  I need to know what others want to do.  And then, after all of that, I need to adjust my schedule to fit everything together.
I have a small calendar on my desk which outlines the required activities of each day as well as my work schedule.  I know that, if I'm not working, I'll spend my afternoon with my boyfriend.  I know we'll either play board games or watch TV or play tennis.  I know, after that, we'll cook dinner and eat together.
I've been anxious even with my calendar lately.  It's kind of scaring me.
I don't do well with anxiety.  And when I've been anxious a lot, I start getting anxious that I will get anxious.  Which is absurdly absurd.  Because anxiety is such a vague thing, it makes me feel completely useless for being anxious about anxiety.  I mean, I really should be anxious about *something* if I'm going to be anxious at all, right?
I take medications which are supposed to make me less anxious.  I don't know if they work.  All I know is that I've been incredibly anxious today and I'm not sure why.
Any tips would be appreciated.
How do you deal with anxiety?