Friday, 11 April 2014

An Influx of Spirituality

Lately, I have found myself getting more spiritual.  I "converted" to Christianity when I was a teenager; I was raised in a rather atheistic home and found the church when I was at an age and stage in my life where I really struggled to belong.  Living for God made me less lonely in a lonely world, I suppose.  That's how I see it, at least, when I look back on those times.  I had few friends and little want for friends, but I needed a purpose, and God's love was that purpose.  

It still is, today.  

My religious convictions come in waves.  One day, I am full of love for Jesus and thankful for the life He has constructed for me.  Other days, I have more questions.  Still other days, I have more earthly things to think about, and those immediate issues always seem so pressing.  

I think I know the kind of person I want to be, and I think my religion is going to be an important part of that.  
It's funny - there are so many Autistic individuals I know who absolutely reject religion, and honestly I feel like one of the few who is drawn to it.  Weird.  That's a deep and complicated idea that we won't delve into now, but I assume there is a reason for it.  

I like having a plan and it's comforting to think that God has a plan for me, even when the rest of the world seems completely opposed to giving me firm details.  

I'm still trying to figure myself out, obviously.  More on that later.