Monday, 14 January 2013

The Days I Hate Autism

My best friend told me today that she hates my autism because sometimes she needs to talk about her feelings and I tell her to "get over it" because what she's feeling doesn't make sense to me and I'm uncomfortable around people feeling strong emotions.  She told me I was being selfish.  
I told her I was being me.  
I am 20 years old, and this is the first time I've ever encountered anyone who openly suggested that I would be better without autism.  
I am angry.  
I am angry and I am confused and I feel betrayed.  I want to change.  And I am equally frustrated by the idea that *I* am questioning my worth as an autistic person and by the knowledge that I will be this way forever.